Saturday, December 15, 2007

Insight into our cultural differences

From Arab press:

Do We Need Someone to Watch Over Us? Abeer Mishkhas

In a recent case reported in Arab News, two girls, aged 13 and 11, are said to have been sexually assaulted by their brother. They were taken to hospital where they remained for 11 days without being checked by the doctors to confirm the assault. The story goes on to say that one of the reasons the doctors did not check was because permission was required from either a judge or the legal guardian of the two girls who, in this case, is an alcoholic father. So what happened next? Nothing as it seems the girls were not examined so the case could not be established and we might well hear in a few days time that the two girls have been returned to the custody of their legal guardian. As frustrating as this case is, it provides us with a good look at a bigger problem which is the “legal guardian” one.

So many cases have been reported to the police in which the legal guardian is the abuser, and yet in most of these cases, nothing happens to the so-called guardian. In the case of Fatima and Mansour, when she was forcibly divorced from her husband, she was automatically moved to another guardian’s custody. After all as a woman, she cannot be trusted without some male hovering over her head and affording her legality. Some man has to be responsible for every single female in Saudi Arabia. So, Fatima was told she had to return to the care of her legal guardian who is her brother. This brother, by the way, happens to be the source of all the trouble and he is also the reason she is now divorced from a man she was happily married to. But because Fatima is a woman of strong character, she refuses to go back to her legal guardian, thus leaving her with only one court-approved alternative -- to remain in a prison-like shelter away from her daughter and husband.

Few months ago, the Arabic press carried the rather disturbing story of a man who was serving a sentence in jail and decided to marry his 16-year-old daughter to another prisoner who is awaiting a death sentence. The official who registered the marriage asked the prison authorities to provide a private place where the prisoner could meet his bride and it was all arranged, easily and smoothly.

But is that legal? Is the guardian in this case who is a convicted imprisoned criminal still allowed perform a guardian’s duty? This shows how this principle can be both unfair and degrading. Apparently, being in prison is no reason for a man to relinquish the power he has over his daughter. And the papers quoted several famous Saudi scholars who said the fact the father is in prison does not mean he cannot continue as the girl’s legal guardian. The story continues; it is the wedding day and the father of the bride, along with the groom, are ready to sign the marriage contract. The sheikh who is the marriage registrar asks both men to provide the medical certificate that is now a legal requirement for registering marriages. The father refuses to provide the paper, saying that such a thing is counter to his traditions. The groom attempts to persuade him to provide the paper but he fails and the marriage is therefore canceled. I will leave it to you readers to draw your own conclusion about responsible guardians.

What I really want to know is why every woman in Saudi Arabia need to have a legal guardian? I understand the necessity to have some sort of a guardian for underaged girls and boys, although this right must be subject to some kind of control and certainly should not be absolute. The way things are in the Kingdom, the legal guardian owns his ward; his ward can do nothing without his approval or permission. If we leave childhood and move on to adulthood, the system remains the same. The guardian is able to exercise the same absolute rights and powers and no matter how old or educated the woman is, she has to have a man who is responsible for her. After all, according to Saudi thought, a woman with no guardian is a problem just waiting to happen.

To say that all guardians abuse their rights is unfair and wrong. There are many who do their best to take care of their female relatives and who treat them properly and correctly. That does not mean, however, that the system is working as it should. The system needs to be changed and the guardian’s absolute power should be curbed. It is time to allow women to be normal human beings who make their own choices, make their decisions and are responsible for themselves.


* Published in Saudi Arabia's ARAB NEWS

Comment: We, in the West need to stop ignoring our vast cultural differences. Furthermore we need not accept these differences either! Pull your heads out of the sand -are these the values you want your grand children to adopt?

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